Short jokes on secret of happy marriage..
Son: Dad, What is the secret of happy married life is.......
Dad replied in short: It is still a secret!!
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Short jokes at father's friend home..
Father's friend: It is too late, you sleep here at my short baby's room.
Boy thought that baby will disturb me at night so he replied: OK, but i will sleep at another room.
At morning he saw a beautiful girl next to her on breakfast table.
She said i am baby and who are you?
Boy: I am the biggest fool!!
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Short jokes on watch and wife..
Once a short man asked: What is the difference between watch and wife?
Short friend replied: If a watch gets angry, it stops but if wife gets angry, she starts..
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Short jokes on barbers..
Son: Why do barbers become good drivers shortly?
Father replied in short: Because they know all the short cuts..
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Short jokes on birthday gift..
Mom: My dear daughter, you birthday is coming soon, so what present do you want?
Daughter: A very short gift mom, Just a music system with a luxury car around..
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Short jokes when nothing goes right..
Father: Tell me, what do you do, when nothing goes right?
Son: It is very short and simple dad, i go LEFT!
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Short jokes on 2011 wives..
Husband: One short cup coffee..
Wife: whhatt?? Ask again!!
Husband: can i get for you, dear?
Wife: Well, that's better..
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Short Jokes on C A T..
Micky: I am going to give exam.
Neighbor: Than why are taking your short cat with you?
Micky: Because, i have an exam of C A T entrance..
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Short man jokes..
Q: what does make a short man to think about candle light dinner?
A: Well, because of Power fail...
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Drunk driver asked his wife: Dear, in life sometimes there are opposite meaning of words.
wife: how??
Driver: like, we park our car in the driveway and drive our car on the parkway?
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couples conversations:--

male: I could go to the end of the world for you.
female: Yes, but would you stay there?
male: I want to share everything with you.
female: Let's start from your bank account.
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Couple was discussing about their daughter progress..
Husband: I am sure that our daughter has got her brain from me..
Wife replied: I think you are right, because i still have my brain with me...
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Once old man said: When a newly married couple smiles, everyone knows why.
But when a fifteen year married couple smile everyone wonders why..!!!
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wife: Why are you late?
hubby: There was a man who lost a hundred dollar bill.
wife: That's nice. Were you helping him look for it?
hubby: No. I was standing on it.
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Groom: Father, I have found a woman just like my mother.
Father: then what do you want from me, sympathy??
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Wife: Do you know that why are crows black?
Husband: yes, because they don't have money to buy Fair & Lovely!!
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Wife: I have great news for you, very soon we are going three instead
of two in this house.
Husband: Wow, I love you honey, I am the happiest person in the world.''
Wife: Thank you so much you feel that way because tomorrow from evening my mother will stay with us.!!
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Wife: Today is our anniversary, what should we do?
Husband: well, let us stand in silence for two minutes.!!!
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Man: How did you compromise with your wife?
Husband: She came to me on her feet.
Man: and what she said?
Husband: i was down under the bad and she said come out, i will not say you anything...

Short jokes on dog's life..
Girl: Why dogs don't marry?
Boy: Simply because they are already having a short life of dog.
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Short jokes on wife fear..
Man: My wife is short temper & she also scare of water.
Friend: how do you know?
Man: Today when i went home, she was in bath tub with the security guard. !!
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Short friend jokes..
Man to his short friend: Do you one thing?
Short man: what?
Man: You are so short that you are the last person to know that its raining..
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Short manager jokes..
Q: What is Manager?
A: A manager, in short, Who flies in, craps on everything, makes a lot of noise and then leaves.
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'Life is very short and jokes make it colorful. We must find a reason to smile. Anything which makes you smile from inner heart is really worth for you. Short jokes are really capable of doing it. In short never forget to live and enjoy your present moments with funny Short jokes.'

Boss: Where were you born?

Sardar: India ..

Boss: which part?

Sardar: What 'which part'? Whole body was born in India .

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2 sardar were fixing a bomb in a car.

Sardar 1: What would you do if the bomb

explodes while fixing.


Sardar 2: Dont worry, I have one more.

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Sardar: What is the name of your car?

Lady: I forgot the name, but is starts with 'T'.

Sardar: Oh, what a strange car, starts with Tea. All cars that I know start with petrol.

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Sardar joined new job. 1st day he worked till late evening on the computer. Boss was happy and asked what you did till evening.

Sardar: Keyboard alphabets were not in order, so I made it alright.

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At the scene of an accident a man was crying: O God! I have lost my hand, oh!

Sardar: Control yourself. Don't cry. See that man. He has lost his head. Is he crying?

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Sardar: U cheated me.

Shopkeeper: No, I sold a good radio to u.

Sardar: Radio label shows Made in Japan but radio says this is 'All India Radio! '

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NOW THE LAST TWO ULTIMATE:

In an interview, Interviewer: How does an electric motor run?

Sardar: Dhhuuuurrrrrrrrrr. .....

Inteviewer shouts: Stop it.

Sardar: Dhhuurrrr dhup dhup dhup...

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Tourist: Whose skeleton is that?

Sardar: An old king's skeleton.

Tourist: Who's that smaller skeleton next to it?

Sardar: That was same king's skeleton when he was a child.

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SARDAR:- Yar iska matlab kya hota hai, "I AM GOING"?

FRIEND:- Main jaa raha hun.

SARDAR:- Saaley, aise kaise jayega, 20 aur bhi aise ja chuke hain....answer bata ke jaa..

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Santa went to temple & saw people puting coin in box & praying

Santa: Wow! How amazing. People are talking to God through coin phone without receiver

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Waiter gives bill to Sardar

Sardar: "Take my card."

Waiter: "But sir, this is Ration Card."

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SardarJi: Ghar mai Mera he Hukam chalta hai.

Mai Kehta hon, Garam paani le aao, woh le aati hai,

Dost: Garam pani Q?

Sardar: Garam pani se Bartan Achay Dhultay hain.

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A teacher asked her class for sentences using the word "beans"..

"My father grows beans," said one student.

"My father cooks beans," said another.

Then a Little Sardarji spoke up: "We are all human beans."

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Sardar k 12 bachon mein 1 alag dikhta tha:

Jab uski biwi marnay wali thi to Sardar ne poocha: Ab to bata do ye kis ka hai?

Sardarni: Sartaj, sirf yehi aapka hai.

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Two Sardar stopped suddenly.

1st Sardar: OMG! My wife and my girlfriend coming together.

2nd Sardar: Mine too.

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A sardar goes to a restaurant

and his cell phone rings.

Wife: How are you?


Surprised Sardarji:Oji I am fine but

how did you know where I was?

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How do you recognize a Sardar in School?

He is the one who erases the notes from

the book when the teacher erases the board.

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Sardarji to others:

Did anyone lose money wrapped in a rubber band?

One said, Yes I did

Sardar: Well, it’s your lucky day,

I found the rubberband!


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A sardarji goes to a chinese restaurant

and puts his finger

on the last of menu: Bring this.


Waiter: Oh! you can’t get it

because he is the owner of restaurant.


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A small 2 seater plane was crashed in graveyard.

A Sardar was investigation officer.

In report he said:

500 dead bodies are found

and digging for rest.


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Sardar at an Art Gallery:

I suppose this horrible looking thing is

what you call modern art ?




Art dealer: I beg your pardon sir, thats a mirror!

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Interviewer: Where were you born?

Sardar: Punjab.

Interviewer: Which part?

Sardar: What which part, whole body was born in Punjab. “;-)

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Sardar’s wish : when i die,

I wanna die like my grandpa

who died peacefully in his sleep

not screaming

like all the passengers in the

car he was driving..

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Sardar and Pathan going somewhere together.

They found 1000 Rs. on the way.

Pathan: Let’s take 50/50.

Sardar: What will do of remaining 900?

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Sardar wins 20 cr from Rs. 20 lottery ticket.

Dealer gave 11cr after deducting tax.

Angry Sardar:

“Give me 20 cr or else return my 20 Rs back.”

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A Sardar and his wife filed an application for divorce.

Judge asked: How will you divide?

You have 3 children.

Sardar replied: OK! We will apply next year.

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NURSE kept SARDAR’S FINGER in HER MOUTH

after BLOOD TEST.

THEN SARDAR STARTED DANCING .

NURSE:y r u DANCING.

SARDAR:next is URINE TEST

Waiter gives bill to Sardar

Sardar: Take my card.

Waiter: But sir, this is Ration Card.

Sardar: So what?

You have written outside

“ALL CARDS ACCEPTED”

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Sardar told his servant:

Go and water the plants. Servant

it’s already raining. Sardar: So what?

Take an umbrella and go.

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Judge: Why are you arrested?

Sardar: For shopping early?

Judge: Well, thats not a crime, anyway how early you were shopping?

Sardar: before opening the shop…,

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Sardar sent a SMS to his pregnant wife.

Two seconds later a report came

to his phone and he started dancing.

The report said, “DELIVERED”.

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Interviewer: Congrats, you are selected.

Your 1st month salary is Rs: 6000.

Next month salary will be 10000.

Sardar: Ok sir, I’ll Join next month.

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Sardar proposed a girl……

Girl said am 1 yr elder to u…….

Sardar said Oye no problem

soniye I’ll marry u next year.

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Sardar on phone: Doctor my wife is pregnant.

She is having pain right now.

Doctor: Is this her first child?

Sardar: No this is her husband speaking.

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2 sardar were fixing a bomb in a car.

Sardar 1 : What would you do if the bomb explodes while fixing.

sardar 2 : Don’t worry, I have a one more.

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How do you sink a submarine

filled with sardars..?

.

.

.

.

Just knock the door.

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Astrologer: you must married only 32 years old women to start a happy life.

sardar: shall I married two 16 years old girls

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On a romantic day sardar’s girlfriend asks him,

“Darling on our engagement day will you give me a ring?”

Sardar : “Ya sure, from landline or mobile”.

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As train start running,

a sardar got the train.

TT: Don’t you see it’s female bogie?

Sardar: Sorry, I thought you were a man.

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Doctor to sardar : You will die within 2 hours.

Do you want to see any one before you die?

Sardar : Yes. A good doctor.

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Sardar: Will you marry me?

Girl: Sorry I am a lesbian.

Sardar: What’s a lesbian?

Girl: I like to sleep with girls.

Sardar: Give me a hand… I am also lesbian

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Sardar was busy removing

a wheel from his auto.

A man asks sardar why are

you removing a wheel from your auto.

sardar : Cant you read the board.

Parking is only for 2 wheeler

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Sardar had twins. He named Tara & Sitara.

Again twins, He named Peter & Repeater.

Again twins, He named Max & Climax.

Again twins, finally He named STOP & FULLSTOp:-)

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Sardar joined new job. 1st day he worked till late evening on the computer.

Boss was happy and asked “what you did till evening?”

Sardar :”Keyboard alphabets were not in order, so I made it alright”

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Teacher: “I killed a person”

convert this sentence into future tense

Sardar: The future tense is “You will go to jail”

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Sardar comes back to his car

&

find a note saying ‘Parking Fine’

He Writes a note and sticks it to a pole

‘Thanks for compliment.’

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Sardar complained to the police: ‘Sir, all items are missing,

except the TV in my house.’

Police: ‘How the thief did not take TV?’

Ah Beng : ‘I was watching TV news…’

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Sardar got into a bus on 1st April

when conductor asked for ticket.

He gave Rs.10/-

and took the ticket and said april fool.

I have pass.

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Sardar: I am Proud, coz my son is in Medical College.

Friend: Really, what is he studying.

Sardar: No, he is not studying, they are Studying him.

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Sardar bought a new mobile.

He sent a message to everyone

from his Phone Book & said,

My Mobile No. Has changed.

Earlier it was Nokia 3310. Now it is 6610

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A sardarji photographer is focusing

a dead body’s face in a funeral function,

suddenly all dead persons relatives beat him.

why? He said “SMILE PLEASE”

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Sardar was giving his medical entrance exam

He gave definitions as follows:

Antibody:

Against everybody

Artery:

Study of fine art paintings

Cardiology:

Advanced study of playing cards

CT scan:

Scanning 4 lost whistle..

Coma:

Punctuation mark

Bacteria:

Back door to a cafeteria…

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Sardar sent SMS to his BOSS:

“Me sick, no work”

Boss SMS back:

“When I am sick I kiss my wife try it”

2 hours later sardar sms 2 boss:

“Me ok, ur wife very sweet”

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A sardar goes to an electronics shop to buy a TV.

Do you have color TVs?

Sure.

Give me a green one, please.

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Police:Instead of hospital why did u take ur wife to COMEDY MOVIE during pregnancy

Sardar: ALL the child were crying when they born

I want my child to laugh so i take my wife TO CINEMA

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Teacher: What is tha difference between orange & apple?

Sardar: The color of orange is orange but the color of apple is not apple.

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A bird was disturbing to a Sardar.

Finally Sardar caught it and decided to kill it cruelly,

He took it to the top of a building and dropped it

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Boss asked Sardar

to buy two corner tickets for a movie

to watch with his Girlfriend.

Sardar bought two corner tickets:

A1…………….A25

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A sardar ji Doctor falls in Love with a Nurse.

He writes a love letter to the Nurse :-

I Love You sister….

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Sardar was writing something very slowly.

Friend asked: Why are you writing so slowly?

Sardar: Im writing to my 6 years old son,

he cant read very fast.

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Teacher: How Do You Differentiate

“WIFE” & “MOTHER”

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SARDAR:

Before Marriage We Sleep With “MOTHER”

&

After Marriage

We Sleep With Our “WIFE

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Sardar As A Director:

You Have To Jump In The Swimming Pool From 100.ft Height.

Hero: I Don’t Know Swimming

Sardar: Oye Don’t Worry Yaar! Pool Is Empty;-)


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Teacher told all students

in a class to write an essay

on a cricket match.




All were busy writing except one Sardarji.

He wrote No match, due to rain!!!

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Sardar: ‘Doctor, my son swallowed a key.’

Doctor: When?

Sardar: 3 months ago.

Doctor: What were u doing till now?

Sardar: We were using duplicate key.

Doctor: So why have u come today?

Sardar: We ve lost the duplicate key !!!


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Professor:Chemical symbol of Barium?

Sardar: BA




Professor:For sodium?

Sardar: NA




Professor:What will we get if 1 atom of BA

& 2 atoms of NA combined?

Sardar: BANANA

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Sardar in airoplane going to Bombay.

While its landing he shouted:

“Bombay ….Bombay”

Airhostess said: “B silent.”

Sardar: “Ok… Ombay… Ombay”

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Sardar saw a very high Airtel Tower

& red light glowing on the top,

seeing this he said India is developing fast,

see there are traffic signals for Aeroplane in the air

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Teacher: What happen on 1869?

Sardar: I don’t know.

Teacher: Stupid its birthday of Gandhi G.

Now tell me what happen on 1873?

Sardar: Its 4th birthday of Gandhi G:-)

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In bio practical:

Examiner:Tell me the name of

this bird by seeing it’s legs only?

Sardar:I don’t know.

Examiner:You failed, what’s your name?

Sardar:See my legs & tell my name

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Sardar after interview

everything went fine till the time

he asked me for testimonials.

I guess i showed him the wrong thing !!!

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